This morning

In an attempt to become a happier and better human being, I woke up early this morning, took a shower, drank a cup of water, prayed, meditated through the app Headspace, edited my podcast, walked Hank for an hour and a half, and now I'm bustling around trying to get some work done. 

I hope I'll make it to yoga later and hopefully edit a video. 

Blessings to you on this Monday. 

 

I've been having a lot of internal struggles lately and I'm just going to go ahead and ramble here and I'm not going to care about grammar-I'm just going to go ahead and just type, type, type...

Okay so life for me and I'm sure for a lot of other actors, hosts, singers, etc., it looks something like this:

& it's been a lot of "what's the point?", and "are you good enough?" and "are you a basic bitch?" and the answer to all of this is "there's a reason you did this, yes, you are good enough, and yeah you're kind of basic in some ways and non-basic in other ways."

There are two ways I know I can handle these feelings of doom and moments of stress:

  1. Let it completely ruin your day and your life. 
  2. LATHER IN IT AND LET IT MAKE YOU STRONG LIKE BULL.

I've been way too busy doing choice #1 to realize there was a #2 but this past week was really rough on me mentally that I can't make this week feel like last week cause it was shitty.

So here's to my Sunday night mentally and emotionally preparing for this week of not knowing where my career is going or if I'm doing enough because f it, stressing about this all is making me not enjoy the damn sun, or really good espresso, or the fact that my foster dog Champ is the best, or that Hank is doing well with his treatment, or that Scott is the best, or that my family & friends are great, or that I've been sticking to yoga. We gotta always remember what's good in life and things were grateful for cause it could always be horse. So here's to this week-I will win & I will rise up.

we will win & we will rise...

high into the sky........................

 

HANK UPDATE

My foster dog Hank has been through a lot in his young life. He got into fights with dogs, was neglected, and found on the street limping, bleeding, and alone. 

When he came to us, he was great. He was cuddly, loving, handsome, and we fell in love. 

He soon quickly fell very ill and collapsed on me twice. 

After many tests, vets, hospital visits, and people telling us to put him down because it was too expensive to find out what was wrong with him, Scott & I decided to take Hank under our financial and loving wing and find out what exactly was wrong with Hank and see if there was treatment available. 

He was finally diagnosed with babesiosis:

Babesiosis is the diseased state caused by the protozoal (single celled) parasites of the genus Babesia. Infection in a dog may occur by tick transmission, direct transmission via blood transfer from dog bites, blood transfusions, or transplacental transmission. The most common mode of transmission is by tick bite, as the Babesia parasite uses the tick as a reservoir to reach host mammals. The incubation period averages about two weeks, but symptoms may remain mild and some cases are not diagnosed for months to years. Piroplasms infect and replicate in the red blood cells, resulting in both direct and immune-mediated hemolytic anemia, where the red blood cells (RBCs) are broken down through hemolysis (destruction) and hemoglobin is released into the body. This release of hemoglobin can lead to jaundice, and to anemia when the body cannot produce enough new red blood cells to replace the ones being destroyed. Immune-mediated hemolytic anemia is likely to be more clinically important than parasite-induced RBC destruction, since the severity of the condition does not depend on the degree of parasitemia.

The problem was that there isn't a lot of research on treating this disease. It's not a "hey take these pills and he'll be fine!" kind of sickness. Long story short, the vets at Pompton Lakes Animal Hospital respected what Scott and I were doing, had already fell in love with Hank, and decided to do whatever it took to give him a chance at life. 

The vet texted me these photos today saying Hank is doing great and reacting great to treatment. Thank you God, thank you vets, thank you Scott, and thank you Hank. Please keep sending positive vibes & prayers for this boy.